Back to the Drawing Board
So now it's almost August. After a few sub-optimal health weeks... so far so good on becoming something closer to a person and farther from a medical freakshow. But you know, fingers crossed, cuz you never know.
As I face my first tempo run in 2-3 weeks now, with some trepidation, I'm feeling a little bit bummed that all this time I thought I had is slowly becoming... not as much time. The meets of interest are: Alumni meet (9/6), Westmont (9/13) and Riverside (9/27) ... which basically means I've got about 2 months. Sounds like enough time...? Well, unfortunately, when you can only run 5 days a week and 20-30 miles, its almost ridiculously scary how little progress you make in 2 months. RIDICULOUSLY scary.
So, its back to the drawing board... what can I accomplish in 2 months OR, do I sit out cross and run some thanksgivings/winter road races and try for track in the spring?
Sunday 07/20: 1:40:55, Dried-up Creek Trail from County Line to a big tree past some farms and a pipe factory. About 100 degrees out, it took me all 100 minutes to run probably 10.x miles according to the mile markers... felt like I was going slowly enough to not die until about the last 15-20 minutes until there was just no speed that didn't feel like ass. Peter rode by during this time period, I thought I was going to die of shame. Based on the last 2 long runs I've done out here... I think about 80 minutes is my absolute max in the heat and altitude.
Monday 07/21: Off, shots. I think the hell mouth has opened up somewhere near here, maybe as a result of the huge sinkhole that appeared on the 110 freeway right next to my house. Blood just gushed out everywhere when I got the shots today.
Tuesday 07/22: 49:28, Monterrey to end of Arroyo Tempo Loop and back on the other side. This run wasn't the greatest, there were construction trucks parked in my favorite spot, and having to park far away didn't really account for enough of the slowness... but it felt like the best run ever simply bc it was NOT 90-100 degrees out!
Wednesday 07/23: 1:03:53, 3 mile track tempo in 21:09 (6:54, 7:00, 7:15). Clearly not a well executed workout... but it was almost all worth it just to get that one sub-7 minute mile. I think it's literally been about 1.5 years since I last ran anything that fast... over 2 years since my last sub-6 minute mile... oh, how the mighty have fallen. Nevertheless, it was a nice session, the North Fields were mysteriously left open this morning, so I warmed up and cooled down there. Really liked the format of warming up for 21 minutes, tempo for 21 minutes, cool down for 21 minutes (plus some random seconds). It has a nice symmetry.
Also the first 5 or 6 laps on the track felt really really good, for the first time I found a steady rhythm and consistent pacing... my breathing started to catch around the end of the second mile, and I guess I'd crossed that line already by that point because the last mile was just slogging... but then I realized that my legs weren't really tired so its really still just a cardio issue, which is where the whole training volume thing starts to bite me in the ass.
Thursday 07/24: 48:57, California to Salvia Canyon. Surprisingly good (AND not snail paced) run... it's been really nice that the temperatures have been cool lately. Felt a little bit tired in the beginning, but felt good by the end. Really starting to feel stircrazy about wanting to pick up the pace a little bit.
Friday 07/25: Off, shots. First time in a while that nothing distressing happened as a result of the shots. I guess it's because my dosage was scaled back rather drastically. I guess it's going to be a while longer before I can go only once a week...
Saturday 07/26: 35:25, One RB trail perimeter loop starting medium and ending tempo. Somehow misread the e-mail and missed the group meeting in the Arroyo, so sadly drove to RB by myself at which point it was way later and drastically warmer than I'd have preferred. I really, really, did not feel like running at this point, but rather than face the shame of coming home without having accomplished anything, I promised myself I'd at least make one round of the trail perimeter... the faster I run, the faster I could go home, and so I gradually accelerated to a pretty good clip by the end.
Accompanied Peter on his Bike/Fix Flat/Eat 2 Bagels/Bike Triathlon afterwards. Verdugo to Chevy Chase to Linda Vista. I don't think Peter thought I would make it all the way on Chevy Chase so we cut back early on Linda Vista... about 2 hours. Climbing is SO hard... I can't believe how weak I've become on the bike.
Training this week: 4:58:38 and 2 hours of cycling
Goals: To not get sick, argh, everyone is sick....
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Week of 07/13/2008 - 07/19/2008 (Base Week 18)
So tired....
So starts or ends one of the most physically painful weeks I can remember. Right now, its day 4 and I can't foresee how I'm going to survive my last day on medication, but... I'm not sure what's worse, this, or potentially more hives. I'm just so freaking scared... both states are completely debilitating, you're either flat on your back with ice packs all over your body unable to leave your room lest you will scare the living daylights out of someone--or you are what I am now, a completely useless and zombified, medicated blob, stuck between a hellish limbo world of eternal drowsiness and artificial wakefulness. There's got to be some mythical level of hell where the torture is to be mortally exhausted without ever being able to sleep again.
Sunday 07/13: 1:14:15, California to RB perimeter and back. Woke up at 5 am like usual, but by now I feel worse than I've ever felt. Thought I was going to throw up, so I laid in bed half awake until about 8 am... when I realized that if I didn't get my shit together and run now, I may never leave this bed. Run was okay until the last 1.5 miles or so when I developed severe abdominal cramping. Given that, ~ 9 minute miles isn't horrible, I was expecting much worse. Since I have had so little to eat these days, I'm going to assume its just the medicine tearing up my stomach. When I got back I felt light headed and nauseous too... barely choked down the third to last dose of Prednisone and then had to lay down for a few hours.
Monday 07/14: Off, shots. While it may not always seem so, I TRY not to be catastrophically negative in my blog... but, sigh, some days, life suck-eth. While the nausea from the drugs is gradually wearing off after my last dose this morning, it's steadily being replaced by a sick dread that I'll see more hives tomorrow morning... the fact that old room mate hasn't decided yet whether he's moving out in September, subletter guy just scraped up our hardwood floors, and boy its so great when everyone in the office has the plague, and you're taking immunosuppressant drugs! Well, whoopie doo.
Tuesday 07/15: 42:01, Monterrey to bridge. 24 hours after my last dose, thankfully the mental haze is starting to lift... basically still felt like my body has been beaten into the ground, but the run wasn't as slow as it could have been. Felt alright, mostly like my legs were going on autopilot and the rest of my weary self was being dragged along. I'll take it though... any state that doesn't have the awful medication or hives, that's all I want.
Wednesday 07/16: 1:07:17, Arroyo running with KB and Justine! Really fun, its so different to run with folks. I was feeling depressed this morning bc there were a small cluster of hives at midnight and then at 6 am this morning... but I decided they were small enough to hide with some baggy clothing so I decided to take an Allegra and meet the group anyways. Felt pretty good, longer than usual but didn't seem hard. An added plus, running seems to make the hives disappear. I'm trying to take the small outbreak in stride, because basically I just want to never, ever have to take Prednisone ever again at all costs. Those 5 days were like the most awful, nauseous and tired I've felt in years.
Thursday 07/17: 46:55, Monterrey to the end of the Arroyo Tempo Loop and back on the other side. Auspiciously ran into both Scott and Mandy. Hamstrings a little bit tight but felt good. I think not having done a tempo run in 2 weeks, I'm starting to feel kind of stir-crazy. Yesterday a bit longer than I'm used to though, so kept it short today.
FYI, something strange is up in the neighborhood today, as there was a helicopter hovering directly above my house between the hours of 3 am and 5 am today. Really didn't appreciate that actually... esp given that I really haven't gotten a lot of sleep in the past 2 weeks as it is...
Friday 07/18: Off, shots. Normalcy returns (?) fingers crossed. Slept for more than 3 consecutive hours for the first time in weeks... They cut back my shot dosage in case the serum was causing the hives, which is sucky bc it prolongs the time between now and when I can only get shots ONCE a week, but that aside, this was like the most normal day in a while.
Saturday 07/19: 55:02, Wildcat Trail in CO with short detour. This was the day of the Mt. Evans Hill Climb, and Peter's performance is definitely more noteworthy than my run. He did really well despite sub-optimal training + sub-optimal breakfast (cream cheese, wtf?) + sub-optimal support from girlfriend (we parked far away from the start, so I ate some cereal and then fell asleep in the car due to 2 hours of sleep from flight delay yesterday). The winning time for the pro-1-2's seems manageable maybe next year--provided you don't get an appearance from someone like Tom Danielson.
Run was non-enjoyable in kind of a nondescript sort of way. It was like 90 degrees and extremely windy. But not windy in the "not as hot" sort of way, windy in the "encounter resistance towards moving forwards" sort of way. Oh, well.
Training this week: 4:45:30, back on the ball. Sort of.
G0als: I just want to stop feeling like I want to die. In one's normal state, a person may wish for or strive for a large number of things, but all I can say is that the only thing I want in this world right now is to be able to live a normal life. (ie, preferably one that is not permanently medicated or physically disfigured).
So starts or ends one of the most physically painful weeks I can remember. Right now, its day 4 and I can't foresee how I'm going to survive my last day on medication, but... I'm not sure what's worse, this, or potentially more hives. I'm just so freaking scared... both states are completely debilitating, you're either flat on your back with ice packs all over your body unable to leave your room lest you will scare the living daylights out of someone--or you are what I am now, a completely useless and zombified, medicated blob, stuck between a hellish limbo world of eternal drowsiness and artificial wakefulness. There's got to be some mythical level of hell where the torture is to be mortally exhausted without ever being able to sleep again.
Sunday 07/13: 1:14:15, California to RB perimeter and back. Woke up at 5 am like usual, but by now I feel worse than I've ever felt. Thought I was going to throw up, so I laid in bed half awake until about 8 am... when I realized that if I didn't get my shit together and run now, I may never leave this bed. Run was okay until the last 1.5 miles or so when I developed severe abdominal cramping. Given that, ~ 9 minute miles isn't horrible, I was expecting much worse. Since I have had so little to eat these days, I'm going to assume its just the medicine tearing up my stomach. When I got back I felt light headed and nauseous too... barely choked down the third to last dose of Prednisone and then had to lay down for a few hours.
Monday 07/14: Off, shots. While it may not always seem so, I TRY not to be catastrophically negative in my blog... but, sigh, some days, life suck-eth. While the nausea from the drugs is gradually wearing off after my last dose this morning, it's steadily being replaced by a sick dread that I'll see more hives tomorrow morning... the fact that old room mate hasn't decided yet whether he's moving out in September, subletter guy just scraped up our hardwood floors, and boy its so great when everyone in the office has the plague, and you're taking immunosuppressant drugs! Well, whoopie doo.
Tuesday 07/15: 42:01, Monterrey to bridge. 24 hours after my last dose, thankfully the mental haze is starting to lift... basically still felt like my body has been beaten into the ground, but the run wasn't as slow as it could have been. Felt alright, mostly like my legs were going on autopilot and the rest of my weary self was being dragged along. I'll take it though... any state that doesn't have the awful medication or hives, that's all I want.
Wednesday 07/16: 1:07:17, Arroyo running with KB and Justine! Really fun, its so different to run with folks. I was feeling depressed this morning bc there were a small cluster of hives at midnight and then at 6 am this morning... but I decided they were small enough to hide with some baggy clothing so I decided to take an Allegra and meet the group anyways. Felt pretty good, longer than usual but didn't seem hard. An added plus, running seems to make the hives disappear. I'm trying to take the small outbreak in stride, because basically I just want to never, ever have to take Prednisone ever again at all costs. Those 5 days were like the most awful, nauseous and tired I've felt in years.
Thursday 07/17: 46:55, Monterrey to the end of the Arroyo Tempo Loop and back on the other side. Auspiciously ran into both Scott and Mandy. Hamstrings a little bit tight but felt good. I think not having done a tempo run in 2 weeks, I'm starting to feel kind of stir-crazy. Yesterday a bit longer than I'm used to though, so kept it short today.
FYI, something strange is up in the neighborhood today, as there was a helicopter hovering directly above my house between the hours of 3 am and 5 am today. Really didn't appreciate that actually... esp given that I really haven't gotten a lot of sleep in the past 2 weeks as it is...
Friday 07/18: Off, shots. Normalcy returns (?) fingers crossed. Slept for more than 3 consecutive hours for the first time in weeks... They cut back my shot dosage in case the serum was causing the hives, which is sucky bc it prolongs the time between now and when I can only get shots ONCE a week, but that aside, this was like the most normal day in a while.
Saturday 07/19: 55:02, Wildcat Trail in CO with short detour. This was the day of the Mt. Evans Hill Climb, and Peter's performance is definitely more noteworthy than my run. He did really well despite sub-optimal training + sub-optimal breakfast (cream cheese, wtf?) + sub-optimal support from girlfriend (we parked far away from the start, so I ate some cereal and then fell asleep in the car due to 2 hours of sleep from flight delay yesterday). The winning time for the pro-1-2's seems manageable maybe next year--provided you don't get an appearance from someone like Tom Danielson.
Run was non-enjoyable in kind of a nondescript sort of way. It was like 90 degrees and extremely windy. But not windy in the "not as hot" sort of way, windy in the "encounter resistance towards moving forwards" sort of way. Oh, well.
Training this week: 4:45:30, back on the ball. Sort of.
G0als: I just want to stop feeling like I want to die. In one's normal state, a person may wish for or strive for a large number of things, but all I can say is that the only thing I want in this world right now is to be able to live a normal life. (ie, preferably one that is not permanently medicated or physically disfigured).
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Week of 07/06/2008 - 07/12/2008 (Base Week 17)
Once a Runner... again
Sunday's run basically reminded me of a lot of runs I did back in Boston in the summer of '04, my first real summer as a distance runner. Hot, tired and dehydrated, plodding along at 10 minute miles thinking that at least 45 minutes MUST have elapsed but then looking at your watch and it saying "18 minutes". I had assumed that those were growing pains and I had essentially moved out of that phase, but I've had this funny feeling for a while now that maybe the effect of almost 2 years being on and off and injured and fat basically just reset my "long term endurance" bank account to zero, and that's why I'm feeling like I just started running for the first time. 7 minute miles is really really fast, 90 minutes is really really long, and everything's just really really hard. Yep, been there, done that.
I guess this could be really really depressing, but somehow I oddly find it comforting. I'd bungled and blundered my way through about 2 years of training before I semi-permanently injured myself, so it's not like that many years have been lost. On the contrary, it kind of feels like getting a second chance to "do it over". I think I am a little bit ahead of where I was in my first year, and its not spectacular, but I think its because I've been smarter about my training. The idea is that the right foundation I painfully build now will mean that my second "second" year will be better than my '05-06 season. Never really was one to appreciate delayed gratification... but I think I'll manage. It's really a brighter perspective than "I am permanently damaged due to my various medical conditions that I have developed and it will never, ever get better".
Sunday 07/06: 1:38:14, trail along Dried Up Creek... and back. Still everything feeling mostly dead and tired from the hike, and woke up with a dehydration headache in addition... but I desperately needed a slow, flat, long run which I've neglected to do for a while now, so there was no backing out of this one. Thankfully it was slightly less hot than yesterday, but when we got to the starting point, I quickly determined that there was just NO SHADE. Felt really awful just jogging to the porta potty, but I figured if I just went slow enough, I could just log my time and go home without too many disasters. It was a hard, hard run. I just felt really tired in a nonspecific but comprehensive way, and it just seemed like time went by... so slowly. Tried not to check my watch for as long as I could, but when I did it said 19 minutes. Felt a little bit better towards the middle of the run, mostly due to curiosity about getting to the end of the trail, then distracted by seeing some cute deer on the trail. Unfortunately, I gave up on getting to the end of the trail after ~ 50 minutes, but turns out later looking at the map I was actually within a few hundred meters of the end, if I had only known. Bah. The last 30 minutes was really a death march. I felt extremely dehydrated and it was a headwind the entire return journey. Given that though, I pulled through, even had enough left at the end to run strong for the last stretch. I think it would have been fine if I wasn't pre-exhausted and had a little bit of water along the way.
Monday 07/07: Off, shots, traveling. So exhausted, but somehow still having trouble going to bed early. Also, shouldn't have eaten that whole pizza.... Stupid!
Tuesday 07/08: 44:11, Monterrey to bridge. A very blah and unsatisfying run. Body still feels not quite right, also, bad foot complaining louder than usual. Argh. I thought I was going a presentable speed for at least half of this run, but turns out not. Oh, well.
Wednesday 07/09: Unplanned off day--calamity of the world. Literally. Could not run today due to outbreak of hives... which is the grossest thing, ever. Went to the doctor and got started on (another) 5 day course of Prednisone... which contrary to what one may think, does NOT make you faster. But it does make you strung out and unable to sleep but then inordinately tired. Yay. I almost didn't want to take it, but then when I saw new hives forming at the end of the day, I gobbled down the first tablet. Gah. Considered running in the dark where no one would be able to see me... but in the end I felt too tired and defeated. It feels really sad to look so nasty that you can't leave your room.
Thursday 07/10: 50:47, Hungtington/Oak Knoll. The almost 8 minute miles! Went to bed at 10 pm yesterday and, as expected was wide awake at 3 am. Tried to sleep until it got lighter, but realized that I should make the most of being able to wake up early (Dr. Rossi says being on Prednisone is like being on 8 shots of espresso). Saw that there were fewer hives so I decided to venture out into the world for my run. Strangely, after my run, all of the hives were gone!
Not sure if it's the extra day off, the drugs or left over red blood cells from being in Colorado, but I'm getting closer to presentable (er, physically and athletically...). Actually, I probably shouldn't put much stock in what I run in the next 5 days as its likely to be artificially fast or slow depending on where I am in my Prednisone cycle. Did some drills and 3 striders at the track afterwards.
Friday 07/11: Off. Despite all of the meds, the hives came back with a vengeance... were so awful they wouldn't risk giving me my shots today. *sigh*... Felt sick and depressed. No run.
Saturday 07/12: 53:15, Arroyo Recovery Loop (6.5 mile route starting from my house that used to be my day after mountain or track work run). All told, not horrible. I'm starting to get really tired though, per lack of ability to sleep for more than 4 continuous hours. Went to bed at 11 pm, was wide awake by 3 am... but was so exhausted, I tossed and turned and couldn't get out of bed until 7 am. I would say that I want the course of medication to end... but then I would have nothing holding the hives back from eating me alive... so, not sure what's worse.
Goals: uh, to not have hives for the rest of my life.
Training this week: 4:06:27, again on 4 days.... mehhhh
Sunday's run basically reminded me of a lot of runs I did back in Boston in the summer of '04, my first real summer as a distance runner. Hot, tired and dehydrated, plodding along at 10 minute miles thinking that at least 45 minutes MUST have elapsed but then looking at your watch and it saying "18 minutes". I had assumed that those were growing pains and I had essentially moved out of that phase, but I've had this funny feeling for a while now that maybe the effect of almost 2 years being on and off and injured and fat basically just reset my "long term endurance" bank account to zero, and that's why I'm feeling like I just started running for the first time. 7 minute miles is really really fast, 90 minutes is really really long, and everything's just really really hard. Yep, been there, done that.
I guess this could be really really depressing, but somehow I oddly find it comforting. I'd bungled and blundered my way through about 2 years of training before I semi-permanently injured myself, so it's not like that many years have been lost. On the contrary, it kind of feels like getting a second chance to "do it over". I think I am a little bit ahead of where I was in my first year, and its not spectacular, but I think its because I've been smarter about my training. The idea is that the right foundation I painfully build now will mean that my second "second" year will be better than my '05-06 season. Never really was one to appreciate delayed gratification... but I think I'll manage. It's really a brighter perspective than "I am permanently damaged due to my various medical conditions that I have developed and it will never, ever get better".
Sunday 07/06: 1:38:14, trail along Dried Up Creek... and back. Still everything feeling mostly dead and tired from the hike, and woke up with a dehydration headache in addition... but I desperately needed a slow, flat, long run which I've neglected to do for a while now, so there was no backing out of this one. Thankfully it was slightly less hot than yesterday, but when we got to the starting point, I quickly determined that there was just NO SHADE. Felt really awful just jogging to the porta potty, but I figured if I just went slow enough, I could just log my time and go home without too many disasters. It was a hard, hard run. I just felt really tired in a nonspecific but comprehensive way, and it just seemed like time went by... so slowly. Tried not to check my watch for as long as I could, but when I did it said 19 minutes. Felt a little bit better towards the middle of the run, mostly due to curiosity about getting to the end of the trail, then distracted by seeing some cute deer on the trail. Unfortunately, I gave up on getting to the end of the trail after ~ 50 minutes, but turns out later looking at the map I was actually within a few hundred meters of the end, if I had only known. Bah. The last 30 minutes was really a death march. I felt extremely dehydrated and it was a headwind the entire return journey. Given that though, I pulled through, even had enough left at the end to run strong for the last stretch. I think it would have been fine if I wasn't pre-exhausted and had a little bit of water along the way.
Monday 07/07: Off, shots, traveling. So exhausted, but somehow still having trouble going to bed early. Also, shouldn't have eaten that whole pizza.... Stupid!
Tuesday 07/08: 44:11, Monterrey to bridge. A very blah and unsatisfying run. Body still feels not quite right, also, bad foot complaining louder than usual. Argh. I thought I was going a presentable speed for at least half of this run, but turns out not. Oh, well.
Wednesday 07/09: Unplanned off day--calamity of the world. Literally. Could not run today due to outbreak of hives... which is the grossest thing, ever. Went to the doctor and got started on (another) 5 day course of Prednisone... which contrary to what one may think, does NOT make you faster. But it does make you strung out and unable to sleep but then inordinately tired. Yay. I almost didn't want to take it, but then when I saw new hives forming at the end of the day, I gobbled down the first tablet. Gah. Considered running in the dark where no one would be able to see me... but in the end I felt too tired and defeated. It feels really sad to look so nasty that you can't leave your room.
Thursday 07/10: 50:47, Hungtington/Oak Knoll. The almost 8 minute miles! Went to bed at 10 pm yesterday and, as expected was wide awake at 3 am. Tried to sleep until it got lighter, but realized that I should make the most of being able to wake up early (Dr. Rossi says being on Prednisone is like being on 8 shots of espresso). Saw that there were fewer hives so I decided to venture out into the world for my run. Strangely, after my run, all of the hives were gone!
Not sure if it's the extra day off, the drugs or left over red blood cells from being in Colorado, but I'm getting closer to presentable (er, physically and athletically...). Actually, I probably shouldn't put much stock in what I run in the next 5 days as its likely to be artificially fast or slow depending on where I am in my Prednisone cycle. Did some drills and 3 striders at the track afterwards.
Friday 07/11: Off. Despite all of the meds, the hives came back with a vengeance... were so awful they wouldn't risk giving me my shots today. *sigh*... Felt sick and depressed. No run.
Saturday 07/12: 53:15, Arroyo Recovery Loop (6.5 mile route starting from my house that used to be my day after mountain or track work run). All told, not horrible. I'm starting to get really tired though, per lack of ability to sleep for more than 4 continuous hours. Went to bed at 11 pm, was wide awake by 3 am... but was so exhausted, I tossed and turned and couldn't get out of bed until 7 am. I would say that I want the course of medication to end... but then I would have nothing holding the hives back from eating me alive... so, not sure what's worse.
Goals: uh, to not have hives for the rest of my life.
Training this week: 4:06:27, again on 4 days.... mehhhh
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Week of 06/29/2008 - 07/05/2008 (Base Week 16)
Summer Training
I suppose I should put some concrete structure around what I'm hoping to work towards during the summer... but I haven't felt super inspired, to be completely honest. The thematic goal is that I'd like to run XC this fall, and I'd like to be in a position to improve from where I left off 2 years ago. I'm reluctant to set this as the ONLY goal, however, simply in so much as that I need to avoid incurring permanent psychiatric damage (which almost undoubtedly will happen given the pressure to get from here to there in two short months).
That said, I think I will focus on two general ideas for the summer training block:
1. Doing more of the things that I most enjoy about running: Mountain runs, long adventure runs and if fitness at all permits, long threshold tempo runs. I'd like to begin working some of these things that I like to do into the monotony of injury prevention focused training. I think I'm at a point now where I can, if I remember to be smart about it.
2. Doing more of the things that I don't naturally tend to want to do: Making a commitment to striders and technical work, core strengthening, etc. Also, eating less candy, going to bed earlier, and taking down weeks and rest days BEFORE the fatigue accumulates to a point where things start deteriorating.
Sunday 06/29: 1:06:40, Monterrey to RB and back. The scaled back long run after yesterday's adventures. I was expecting my entire system to be thrashed from the mountain run, but I felt pretty good. Legs felt a little bit tired, but I've had worse showings on this route and those were not after a 2 hour uphill the day before... was pleased. Drove down to SD to help Craig pick out a shiny new road bike, and celebrate a calorically dense belated birthday.
Monday 06/30: Off. Shots. Good grief, still feel full from yesterday.
Tuesday 07/01: 43:45, Monterrey to bridge loop. Honestly... still felt a little bit barfy from over-eating on Sunday. I have a notoriously weak digestive system and this was some big time overload. Felt okay other than that. At least the runtimes on this route are working their way back DOWN instead of UP. I'm also really glad that the mountain run hasn't seemed to cripple my foot. *knock on wood*.
Wednesday 07/02: 1:00:33, warm up, 5 x 800m (with 400 jog rest), cool down. Despite the fact that I was supposed to do 6 x 800m, and the South Fields are now technically closed for maintenance, this wasn't a terrible workout... I think I've got to take improvement where I can get it, even if it's not spectacular.
3:15 (97, 98), 3:15 (97, 98), 3:16 (98, 98), 3:15 (98, 97), 3:19 (101, 98) for a modest improvement over the last set of 800's. I think these were calmer and stronger though, like a good pacing workout, I felt like the effort across the laps was distributed a lot more evenly this time. I guess my main challenge is still the endurance, the fifth one was of drastically worse quality than the others, so I decided to skip the sixth one... as I still want these to be "practice running uptempo" intervals, rather than anaerobically stressful intervals. Hopefully the endurance will come with increased training volume (?).
Thursday 07/03: Off, shots. Traveling. A baby was shrieking like a banshee the entire plane ride... felt irate. I don't know how I'm ever going to be able to cope with one of my own. Love (bigger) kids... really do not love babies... not sure what to do about that.
Friday 07/04: Hiking. Happy 4th of July!!! Peter and I embarked on my first 14-er. Due to lack of time and preparation, we chose an easy one, Mt. Bierstadt, where you can just drive up most of the way. It was slated for 7 miles, 4.5 hours with 3,000 ft elevation gain (11,000 to 14,000). Piece of cake? That's what I thought... little did I know....
First of all, let me just say that I did NOT feel fantastic coming out of the parking lot at 11,000 ft. Then you kind of get used to that feeling... but the next thing that I realized was that its kinda okay if you're just putzing around, but it takes roughly a 1% grade of climbing before you start feeling like you're past the anaerobic threshold. This hike totally blew me away. I felt pretty much dizzy and delirious less than halfway up. It was really the strangest feeling, halfway between being exhausted and being drunk, I had to continually fight back the irrational desire to say "WHEEEEEEE!!!!", even though I was clearly not at the top yet.
I really did not think I was going to make it, and there was some scary rock scrambling at the top, but all in all it was pretty cool. We saw some awesome little marmots chasing eachother at the summit. The view was interesting because on one side, there were rolling green mountains mottled with clouds and idyllic little lakes and willow bogs, but on the other side, it was all jagged and steep and gray with a deathly looking lake at the bottom that very clearly was filled with cold, cold meltwater. Long way down. Everything felt pretty beat by the end.
Saturday 07/05: 58:51, Wildcat trail to Grand View trail entrance. A quiet recovery jog (well, to be fair, almost all of my Colorado runs are basically recovery jogs due to altitude), which was made a little bit less pleasant by sleeping in and it somehow having gotten to be 90 degrees. Waited until the afternoon clouds rolled in so it was basically windy and hot but at least the sun wasn't beating down on you. Legs not sore but just very very tired. Went slow and was basically pleasant.
Goals: This is kind of a down week, I just want to enjoy the 4th and some hiking with Peter, and to be well rested and recovered to start again next week.
Training this week: 3:49:49, not bad for 4 days. The hike was the X-factor though... did not anticipate that it would be so strenuous... hence, not so rested feeling.
I suppose I should put some concrete structure around what I'm hoping to work towards during the summer... but I haven't felt super inspired, to be completely honest. The thematic goal is that I'd like to run XC this fall, and I'd like to be in a position to improve from where I left off 2 years ago. I'm reluctant to set this as the ONLY goal, however, simply in so much as that I need to avoid incurring permanent psychiatric damage (which almost undoubtedly will happen given the pressure to get from here to there in two short months).
That said, I think I will focus on two general ideas for the summer training block:
1. Doing more of the things that I most enjoy about running: Mountain runs, long adventure runs and if fitness at all permits, long threshold tempo runs. I'd like to begin working some of these things that I like to do into the monotony of injury prevention focused training. I think I'm at a point now where I can, if I remember to be smart about it.
2. Doing more of the things that I don't naturally tend to want to do: Making a commitment to striders and technical work, core strengthening, etc. Also, eating less candy, going to bed earlier, and taking down weeks and rest days BEFORE the fatigue accumulates to a point where things start deteriorating.
Sunday 06/29: 1:06:40, Monterrey to RB and back. The scaled back long run after yesterday's adventures. I was expecting my entire system to be thrashed from the mountain run, but I felt pretty good. Legs felt a little bit tired, but I've had worse showings on this route and those were not after a 2 hour uphill the day before... was pleased. Drove down to SD to help Craig pick out a shiny new road bike, and celebrate a calorically dense belated birthday.
Monday 06/30: Off. Shots. Good grief, still feel full from yesterday.
Tuesday 07/01: 43:45, Monterrey to bridge loop. Honestly... still felt a little bit barfy from over-eating on Sunday. I have a notoriously weak digestive system and this was some big time overload. Felt okay other than that. At least the runtimes on this route are working their way back DOWN instead of UP. I'm also really glad that the mountain run hasn't seemed to cripple my foot. *knock on wood*.
Wednesday 07/02: 1:00:33, warm up, 5 x 800m (with 400 jog rest), cool down. Despite the fact that I was supposed to do 6 x 800m, and the South Fields are now technically closed for maintenance, this wasn't a terrible workout... I think I've got to take improvement where I can get it, even if it's not spectacular.
3:15 (97, 98), 3:15 (97, 98), 3:16 (98, 98), 3:15 (98, 97), 3:19 (101, 98) for a modest improvement over the last set of 800's. I think these were calmer and stronger though, like a good pacing workout, I felt like the effort across the laps was distributed a lot more evenly this time. I guess my main challenge is still the endurance, the fifth one was of drastically worse quality than the others, so I decided to skip the sixth one... as I still want these to be "practice running uptempo" intervals, rather than anaerobically stressful intervals. Hopefully the endurance will come with increased training volume (?).
Thursday 07/03: Off, shots. Traveling. A baby was shrieking like a banshee the entire plane ride... felt irate. I don't know how I'm ever going to be able to cope with one of my own. Love (bigger) kids... really do not love babies... not sure what to do about that.
Friday 07/04: Hiking. Happy 4th of July!!! Peter and I embarked on my first 14-er. Due to lack of time and preparation, we chose an easy one, Mt. Bierstadt, where you can just drive up most of the way. It was slated for 7 miles, 4.5 hours with 3,000 ft elevation gain (11,000 to 14,000). Piece of cake? That's what I thought... little did I know....
First of all, let me just say that I did NOT feel fantastic coming out of the parking lot at 11,000 ft. Then you kind of get used to that feeling... but the next thing that I realized was that its kinda okay if you're just putzing around, but it takes roughly a 1% grade of climbing before you start feeling like you're past the anaerobic threshold. This hike totally blew me away. I felt pretty much dizzy and delirious less than halfway up. It was really the strangest feeling, halfway between being exhausted and being drunk, I had to continually fight back the irrational desire to say "WHEEEEEEE!!!!", even though I was clearly not at the top yet.
I really did not think I was going to make it, and there was some scary rock scrambling at the top, but all in all it was pretty cool. We saw some awesome little marmots chasing eachother at the summit. The view was interesting because on one side, there were rolling green mountains mottled with clouds and idyllic little lakes and willow bogs, but on the other side, it was all jagged and steep and gray with a deathly looking lake at the bottom that very clearly was filled with cold, cold meltwater. Long way down. Everything felt pretty beat by the end.
Saturday 07/05: 58:51, Wildcat trail to Grand View trail entrance. A quiet recovery jog (well, to be fair, almost all of my Colorado runs are basically recovery jogs due to altitude), which was made a little bit less pleasant by sleeping in and it somehow having gotten to be 90 degrees. Waited until the afternoon clouds rolled in so it was basically windy and hot but at least the sun wasn't beating down on you. Legs not sore but just very very tired. Went slow and was basically pleasant.
Goals: This is kind of a down week, I just want to enjoy the 4th and some hiking with Peter, and to be well rested and recovered to start again next week.
Training this week: 3:49:49, not bad for 4 days. The hike was the X-factor though... did not anticipate that it would be so strenuous... hence, not so rested feeling.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Week of 06/22/2008 - 06/28/2008 (Base Week 15)
Reflections...
On Saturday I felt something that I'd been painstakingly staving off for a good few months now.
I set my alarm for 6 am, woke up at 8 am and found that it was already 90 degrees out. I stumbled, still exhausted and bleary feeling out of bed and the only thought in my head was how much I did not want to run. It wasn't just occasional morning inertia, and it wasn't entirely about the heat, this was big picture training angst and by now I know exactly what the symptoms look like.
For the past few months, I've been getting through it, trying to encourage myself with the small unsatisfying improvements, trying to keep talking positive even though deep down I knew it was a sham. Nobody told me it was going to be so damn hard. It's hard to train when you don't trust your own body, it's harder to train without hope. Between foot tendonitis that flares somewhat unpredictably, weird asthma symptoms, shots twice a week and a lot of still unexplained fatigue and insomnia, training's just not what it used to be. I didn't realize that sometimes you can't keep expecting a breakthrough around the next corner because then you may be disappointed indefinitely. I felt like I would have to dig deep to get through this, and slogging through another sub-par run in the suffocating heat was not going to give me the inspiration that I so desperately needed.
So, I dusted off my beautiful Bianchi and headed off into the summer dusk, to ride until I found what I was looking for. There were all sorts of folks out there at the RB on that unlikely hot evening. A big football looking guy who bravely made it through about 3 laps at a good pace, but clearly struggling towards the end... a girl who roller-bladed alongside her runner boyfriend, a lean, athletic looking guy doing striders, technical work and a strange stint of backwards running, a happy old couple. I wondered at what each of their stories were...
In the end, a whole lot of thinking lead a whole lot of nowhere, but that's alright I suppose. At about 8 pm I ran out of water and daylight simultaneously and so it was time to go home. So home I went and felt content. It was a nice ride on a nice summer evening, and then I realized... you've got to WANT to run. Deep down inside, you've got to want to do each day of training. When it gets about just getting through what's on the training plan, thats when it gets to be no good. I think I've needed an extra day off for a while now, and now that I've taken it, I felt again that I wanted to run.
Sunday 06/22: 1:24:30, JPL adventure run. Longest long run yet. Instead of going to the waterfall, I went the way the signs pointed to Switzer/Brown Mtn. Unfortunately, I didn't have a whole lot of minutes left on the clock in which to explore, but found a nice extended scramble up a steep Bailey-esque narrow trail, that descended into a completely differently vegetated valley. Turned back at the next river crossing but really wanted to know how this linked up to all of these other trails. Was really nice, woke up 1 hour too late at 6 am, but it was unnaturally cooler in the forest and the temperature was just fine.
Took a short nap upon my return and went to hang out with John and Chris, who unfortunately confirmed my suspicion that the majority of the vegetation along that JPL trail was in fact poison oak. Gah, felt like my legs were itchy all day after that. We saw Get Smart, ate Pinkberry and discovered some cool new trails at the end of Lake Ave. Got in workout #2 of the day which involved running up as many giant dirt stairs as possible to get to the top of the mountain before we ran out of daylight. Didn't quite get to see what was at the top, but it was fantastic anyways. Kind of scary coming back down, but we made it!
Monday 06/23: Off. Shots. A really crummy day. Both of my arms swelled up alarmingly after my shots today. No idea why, things have been quiet on the shots end for a while now. There's too much work, and the reason I dislike delegating is that most of the time it doesn't get done the way I want it. Fortunately, I think I still have enough happy left from the weekend to avoid becoming completely irate.
Tuesday 06/24: 44:48, Monterrey to Bridge loop. Legs still a bit tight from Sunday's adventures, so I figured I'd give it an extra day before the tempo. From the slow pace, I'm going to guess it was the right decision. Still really struggling with insomnia during the night and inability to get up in the morning. It wasn't as hot as it's been, but generally the runs on the days I can't get up early enough just don't feel as good. Also bad--my arms are STILL swollen and sore from the damn reaction to the shots yesterday....
Wednesday 06/25: 54:48, warm up, 3 mile steady state, cool down. Especially bad today on waking up.... dragged my lazy ass out of bed a full 90 minutes after I was supposed to, and as a consequence was BOTH uncomfortably warm AND late for work... I had had a good feeling about this workout, but it turned out to be a complete disappointment. 21:31 for 3 miles (7:04, 7:14, 7:13) The worst part is that after the first mile, I felt like I had made a breakthrough, but then after 1.5 miles it quickly became apparent that the same pace was not going to be manageable at this "tempo" amount of effort. I would have been happy with 7:05's... 10 seconds per mile is noticeable improvement, but as it is, this is tantamount to NO improvement. I also felt renewed disgruntlement at the fact that I felt so much more left in my legs but that they are chained to this piece of crap cardiovascular system... which is why I seem to be permanently doomed to be running 7:15's.
Thursday 06/26: 42:32, Huntington/Virginia, started real easy, gradually sped up. My weekly 1 pavement run. On the bright side, I think my feet are kinda getting used to it... though on second thought almost half of this run is actually grass. Oh, well. Did ~half an hour worth of a medley of technical stuff afterwards at the track, high knees, butt kicks, striders and 2 x 200m accelerations. I think I've got a lot of disgruntled energy... bc I normally do not feel enthused to do striders, but today I felt like doing lots of them. Unfortunately also got exposed to a lot of freshly cut grass... so now my throat is raw, been coughing all day and breathing shallow. Damn piece of crap respiratory system/allergies.
Friday 06/27: Off. Shots. Meetings. They cut my dose on the shots bc of Monday's disaster, which is nice bc it didn't swell at all... but not nice in that it prolongs the number of weeks before I can get them just ONCE a week. I also have this hunch that my current work ratio of 25% analysis : 75% difficult person management is here to stay...
Saturday 06/28: 2:05:42, Epic Brown Mountain Half Marathon Adventure, ~1800 ft elevation gain. Ummm, what can I say... Ooops? If there was a sign on my forehead that displayed "X days since last poor training decision", X = 0 as of today. For what it's worth, it was glorious.
http://www.gmap-pedometer.com/?r=2030086
Let's just pretend that I mapped the return route, which is the same way that I came. Went the same way as the Millard Camp Ground route, except instead of descending to the campground, I took the left fork at the intersection to climb a little bit more up to the end of Brown Mountain Upper Mountainway. There were these beautiful narrow trails at the end of the fire road at the top... but since I had already grossly over-extended my "non foot aggravating running minutes" bank account, I had to squelch my curiosity and turn back.
As it turns out, it was kind of a long way home. I also made an unplanned detour and ended up at somebody's farm, which mapped conveniently to 0.8 miles, for a grand total of 13.1 miles. Felt good the whole way climbing up, the descending got old pretty quick, but all in all didn't feel like 2 hours, was definitely ready to be done by the time I got to my car, but it didn't feel like I was going to die or anything. I guess since I'm used to the Mt. Wilson trails, the fireroad felt friendly and not steep.
Training this week: 5:52:20... holy shit.
Goals: To not be driven crazy by work.
On Saturday I felt something that I'd been painstakingly staving off for a good few months now.
I set my alarm for 6 am, woke up at 8 am and found that it was already 90 degrees out. I stumbled, still exhausted and bleary feeling out of bed and the only thought in my head was how much I did not want to run. It wasn't just occasional morning inertia, and it wasn't entirely about the heat, this was big picture training angst and by now I know exactly what the symptoms look like.
For the past few months, I've been getting through it, trying to encourage myself with the small unsatisfying improvements, trying to keep talking positive even though deep down I knew it was a sham. Nobody told me it was going to be so damn hard. It's hard to train when you don't trust your own body, it's harder to train without hope. Between foot tendonitis that flares somewhat unpredictably, weird asthma symptoms, shots twice a week and a lot of still unexplained fatigue and insomnia, training's just not what it used to be. I didn't realize that sometimes you can't keep expecting a breakthrough around the next corner because then you may be disappointed indefinitely. I felt like I would have to dig deep to get through this, and slogging through another sub-par run in the suffocating heat was not going to give me the inspiration that I so desperately needed.
So, I dusted off my beautiful Bianchi and headed off into the summer dusk, to ride until I found what I was looking for. There were all sorts of folks out there at the RB on that unlikely hot evening. A big football looking guy who bravely made it through about 3 laps at a good pace, but clearly struggling towards the end... a girl who roller-bladed alongside her runner boyfriend, a lean, athletic looking guy doing striders, technical work and a strange stint of backwards running, a happy old couple. I wondered at what each of their stories were...
In the end, a whole lot of thinking lead a whole lot of nowhere, but that's alright I suppose. At about 8 pm I ran out of water and daylight simultaneously and so it was time to go home. So home I went and felt content. It was a nice ride on a nice summer evening, and then I realized... you've got to WANT to run. Deep down inside, you've got to want to do each day of training. When it gets about just getting through what's on the training plan, thats when it gets to be no good. I think I've needed an extra day off for a while now, and now that I've taken it, I felt again that I wanted to run.
Sunday 06/22: 1:24:30, JPL adventure run. Longest long run yet. Instead of going to the waterfall, I went the way the signs pointed to Switzer/Brown Mtn. Unfortunately, I didn't have a whole lot of minutes left on the clock in which to explore, but found a nice extended scramble up a steep Bailey-esque narrow trail, that descended into a completely differently vegetated valley. Turned back at the next river crossing but really wanted to know how this linked up to all of these other trails. Was really nice, woke up 1 hour too late at 6 am, but it was unnaturally cooler in the forest and the temperature was just fine.
Took a short nap upon my return and went to hang out with John and Chris, who unfortunately confirmed my suspicion that the majority of the vegetation along that JPL trail was in fact poison oak. Gah, felt like my legs were itchy all day after that. We saw Get Smart, ate Pinkberry and discovered some cool new trails at the end of Lake Ave. Got in workout #2 of the day which involved running up as many giant dirt stairs as possible to get to the top of the mountain before we ran out of daylight. Didn't quite get to see what was at the top, but it was fantastic anyways. Kind of scary coming back down, but we made it!
Monday 06/23: Off. Shots. A really crummy day. Both of my arms swelled up alarmingly after my shots today. No idea why, things have been quiet on the shots end for a while now. There's too much work, and the reason I dislike delegating is that most of the time it doesn't get done the way I want it. Fortunately, I think I still have enough happy left from the weekend to avoid becoming completely irate.
Tuesday 06/24: 44:48, Monterrey to Bridge loop. Legs still a bit tight from Sunday's adventures, so I figured I'd give it an extra day before the tempo. From the slow pace, I'm going to guess it was the right decision. Still really struggling with insomnia during the night and inability to get up in the morning. It wasn't as hot as it's been, but generally the runs on the days I can't get up early enough just don't feel as good. Also bad--my arms are STILL swollen and sore from the damn reaction to the shots yesterday....
Wednesday 06/25: 54:48, warm up, 3 mile steady state, cool down. Especially bad today on waking up.... dragged my lazy ass out of bed a full 90 minutes after I was supposed to, and as a consequence was BOTH uncomfortably warm AND late for work... I had had a good feeling about this workout, but it turned out to be a complete disappointment. 21:31 for 3 miles (7:04, 7:14, 7:13) The worst part is that after the first mile, I felt like I had made a breakthrough, but then after 1.5 miles it quickly became apparent that the same pace was not going to be manageable at this "tempo" amount of effort. I would have been happy with 7:05's... 10 seconds per mile is noticeable improvement, but as it is, this is tantamount to NO improvement. I also felt renewed disgruntlement at the fact that I felt so much more left in my legs but that they are chained to this piece of crap cardiovascular system... which is why I seem to be permanently doomed to be running 7:15's.
Thursday 06/26: 42:32, Huntington/Virginia, started real easy, gradually sped up. My weekly 1 pavement run. On the bright side, I think my feet are kinda getting used to it... though on second thought almost half of this run is actually grass. Oh, well. Did ~half an hour worth of a medley of technical stuff afterwards at the track, high knees, butt kicks, striders and 2 x 200m accelerations. I think I've got a lot of disgruntled energy... bc I normally do not feel enthused to do striders, but today I felt like doing lots of them. Unfortunately also got exposed to a lot of freshly cut grass... so now my throat is raw, been coughing all day and breathing shallow. Damn piece of crap respiratory system/allergies.
Friday 06/27: Off. Shots. Meetings. They cut my dose on the shots bc of Monday's disaster, which is nice bc it didn't swell at all... but not nice in that it prolongs the number of weeks before I can get them just ONCE a week. I also have this hunch that my current work ratio of 25% analysis : 75% difficult person management is here to stay...
Saturday 06/28: 2:05:42, Epic Brown Mountain Half Marathon Adventure, ~1800 ft elevation gain. Ummm, what can I say... Ooops? If there was a sign on my forehead that displayed "X days since last poor training decision", X = 0 as of today. For what it's worth, it was glorious.
http://www.gmap-pedometer.com/?r=2030086
Let's just pretend that I mapped the return route, which is the same way that I came. Went the same way as the Millard Camp Ground route, except instead of descending to the campground, I took the left fork at the intersection to climb a little bit more up to the end of Brown Mountain Upper Mountainway. There were these beautiful narrow trails at the end of the fire road at the top... but since I had already grossly over-extended my "non foot aggravating running minutes" bank account, I had to squelch my curiosity and turn back.
As it turns out, it was kind of a long way home. I also made an unplanned detour and ended up at somebody's farm, which mapped conveniently to 0.8 miles, for a grand total of 13.1 miles. Felt good the whole way climbing up, the descending got old pretty quick, but all in all didn't feel like 2 hours, was definitely ready to be done by the time I got to my car, but it didn't feel like I was going to die or anything. I guess since I'm used to the Mt. Wilson trails, the fireroad felt friendly and not steep.
Training this week: 5:52:20... holy shit.
Goals: To not be driven crazy by work.
Monday, June 16, 2008
Week of 06/15/2008 - 06/21/2008 (Base Week 14)
Where do bad runs go when they die?
They don't go to heaven where the angels fly... The question is though, do they actually end up in the Long Term Fitness Bank as debits or credits? I feel like we're conditioned to believe that the more pain you put in, the more speed you get out... but lately, I'm really not so sure.
Conventional wisdom says that you just have to maintain X amount of effort for Y number of minutes and it deposits into some long term fitness reserve... regardless of the speed at which that particular day's workout occurred, but the problem I have is that there are days that just don't fit that mold. There are days where no amount of slow makes it feel any less like dying... or no amount of effort makes the tempo run any faster, or where you simply don't even think your weary sleep deprived body will make it Y number of minutes at ANY effort level.
These sorts of scenarios didn't used to occur very frequently, but in my present state, they seem to occur alarmingly often... and so I find myself facing this question over and over again lately. I am the Queen of Long and Grueling, so if one day in the future, it will help me, then I'm willing to get through the bad runs, whatever it takes. The thing is, sometimes I wonder if you only dig your hole deeper. What if "getting through it" is what steadily creates a fatigue accumulation from which it takes longer and longer for your body to recover? Maybe there's an opportunity cost to obstinacy. I wish that some day I'll know when to suck it up and absorb the extra day off, or the one missed workout here and there such that I don't suddenly crash and require entire weeks worth of crappy slow runs just to get back to normal.
Sunday 06/15: 1:16:56, RB perimeter starting from California. Argh. Tired and hot. Hips, hamstrings sore, felt marginally better towards the end. About 10 minutes in, I distinctly felt that 1) I was really really thirsty and 2) I couldn't really imagine how I was going to get through the rest of this run. Then about 30 minutes in, R Plantar Fascia began to complain increasingly loudly. Sucked. Too exhausted to do anything else.
Monday 06/16: Off, shots. Insomnia continues. Exhausted, mentally.
Tuesday 06/17: 54:54, warm up, 4 x 800m with 1 lap jog rest, cool down. Kind of a "blah" workout, not horrible, but on the worse end of what I expected. I guess if the goal was to keep the 20 x 200m pace, I told myself I'd be okay with anything in the 3:20 range (assuming we stick to the base model of 50 s 200s) but I guess to be quite honest, what I primarily felt about the result was disappointment: 3:18 (96, 102), 3:20 (100, 100), 3:19 (100, 99), 3:19 (100, 99).
I guess that's kind of the trouble with setting time goals at all. 0:50/200m was an artificial construct to begin with, something that I backed out of the fact that the only guidance I got for this workout was that it was supposed to teach me to run tempo pace again, so I said, say 13:20 is a halfway decent 3 x 2 mile pace, which is the bulk of my upper threshold training, so 13:20/16 = 0:50. The problem is that it's really easy to run a little under 50's... a bit harder to run a little under 3:20, probably even harder to run a little under 6:40... and frankly right now, 13:20 for 2 miles is probably my all-out, dying pace. But the point is, that once you set a precedent of "beating" the goal times, its not very satisfying to run the goal times.
The other thing is that one could fundamentally question whether it was even fair of me to set this as "goal pace". 6:45 was once my tempo pace, but that was after 2 years of hard work and much more intense training than what I'm doing now. I guess if I'm honest with myself, even while knowing that the point of it is to practice running 100 second laps, I didn't WANT that. What I wanted was some indication that 100 second laps would start to feel like a pedestrian pace sometime SOONER rather than later, and needless to say, I didn't get that. Logically, I'm not even sure why I expected to get that.
I'm reminded now about a blog that Sara Hall wrote about the value of being able to have a short term memory. Sometimes, you need a short term memory in order to have mental health, and you need mental health in order to be the best you can be in the future. I know that the bulk of the disgruntlement that I feel about my training these days is because every step of the way from here until "where I used to be" feels excruciatingly like remedial math. No one WANTS to be in remedial math, when their classmates are in Calculus. Unfortunately, it's still not easy to cheerfully accept remedial math, even if you know its good for you.
Wednesday 06/18: 45:19, Monterrey to bridge. Sleeping problems continue, part of it is that it's still hot at night, part of it is that my mental state basically resembles a jungle and a quagmire... woke up late this morning and it was hot and I was massively dehydrated. I've learned better how to manage such situations, but I've concluded that I still don't enjoy them. Drank 3 glasses of water afterwards and still didn't feel quite right. Was also vaguely troubled by the fact that I used to be absolutely horrified that this run took 44 minutes when I was tired... but lately 45 and 46 minute performances have crept up... I almost want to gmaps it to know once and for all how bad the damage is. But must think short term memory, short term memory, short term memory.
Thursday 06/19: 45:22, Huntington/Virginia disaster. This is a run that might have been a good run, but one in which circumstances, unfortunately had other plans. Insomnia continues, resulting in waking up late, which pushed this run over into the evening (which I dislike to begin with). Add to that the fact that the thermometer was still having trouble dipping under 90, and having consumed about the greasiest cheesiest lunch one could imagine. I was already feeling sick after lunch, and running in the heat after that... I simply can't remember any other run that I've done where I was trying to shove down the violent urge to hurl every step of the way. Given that, I really just wanted to be done with this ASAP, so I thought that I was hurrying the best I could, and was honestly bowled over to see the time... it did NOT feel like I was going THAT slow, goodness gracious. Skipped the striders because I was absolutely sure I would hurl if I tried. Just wanted to be invisible, it was so awful. Screw all of this positive thinking crap. It just sucked.
Friday 06/20: Off, shots. Still feeling generally irate today. It's a combination of the sleeping problems and life problems. Oh, and it being 105 degrees every damn day. Argh.
Saturday 06/21: 2:04:20, 32.8 miles on the bike. Heat wave and sleep deprivation continue. Did not feel like running at all. Instead, had a nice breakfast of french toast with Cupcake and talked a lot about math. By 5 pm I felt inspired to ride, and so I did. Initially figured I would do an hour or so, just to get the legs moving, but ended up staying out there for 2 hours, trying to find my peace. 8 laps around the RB, pretty slow ~16 mph, but really enjoyed it. Forgot how different the bike is. It felt like the polar opposite of running, my legs were burning with the unfamiliar exhaustion, but no matter how hard I pushed, I didn't breathe hard at all, it was so strange, I had to sing along to my ipod bc I didn't know what to do with all of this breath. Legs were thoroughly, thoroughly worn out by the end, but I think it did my soul some good.
Goals: Judging from Sunday's run, I don't really think my body found last week very restful. Argh. This week will have to be played by ear.
They don't go to heaven where the angels fly... The question is though, do they actually end up in the Long Term Fitness Bank as debits or credits? I feel like we're conditioned to believe that the more pain you put in, the more speed you get out... but lately, I'm really not so sure.
Conventional wisdom says that you just have to maintain X amount of effort for Y number of minutes and it deposits into some long term fitness reserve... regardless of the speed at which that particular day's workout occurred, but the problem I have is that there are days that just don't fit that mold. There are days where no amount of slow makes it feel any less like dying... or no amount of effort makes the tempo run any faster, or where you simply don't even think your weary sleep deprived body will make it Y number of minutes at ANY effort level.
These sorts of scenarios didn't used to occur very frequently, but in my present state, they seem to occur alarmingly often... and so I find myself facing this question over and over again lately. I am the Queen of Long and Grueling, so if one day in the future, it will help me, then I'm willing to get through the bad runs, whatever it takes. The thing is, sometimes I wonder if you only dig your hole deeper. What if "getting through it" is what steadily creates a fatigue accumulation from which it takes longer and longer for your body to recover? Maybe there's an opportunity cost to obstinacy. I wish that some day I'll know when to suck it up and absorb the extra day off, or the one missed workout here and there such that I don't suddenly crash and require entire weeks worth of crappy slow runs just to get back to normal.
Sunday 06/15: 1:16:56, RB perimeter starting from California. Argh. Tired and hot. Hips, hamstrings sore, felt marginally better towards the end. About 10 minutes in, I distinctly felt that 1) I was really really thirsty and 2) I couldn't really imagine how I was going to get through the rest of this run. Then about 30 minutes in, R Plantar Fascia began to complain increasingly loudly. Sucked. Too exhausted to do anything else.
Monday 06/16: Off, shots. Insomnia continues. Exhausted, mentally.
Tuesday 06/17: 54:54, warm up, 4 x 800m with 1 lap jog rest, cool down. Kind of a "blah" workout, not horrible, but on the worse end of what I expected. I guess if the goal was to keep the 20 x 200m pace, I told myself I'd be okay with anything in the 3:20 range (assuming we stick to the base model of 50 s 200s) but I guess to be quite honest, what I primarily felt about the result was disappointment: 3:18 (96, 102), 3:20 (100, 100), 3:19 (100, 99), 3:19 (100, 99).
I guess that's kind of the trouble with setting time goals at all. 0:50/200m was an artificial construct to begin with, something that I backed out of the fact that the only guidance I got for this workout was that it was supposed to teach me to run tempo pace again, so I said, say 13:20 is a halfway decent 3 x 2 mile pace, which is the bulk of my upper threshold training, so 13:20/16 = 0:50. The problem is that it's really easy to run a little under 50's... a bit harder to run a little under 3:20, probably even harder to run a little under 6:40... and frankly right now, 13:20 for 2 miles is probably my all-out, dying pace. But the point is, that once you set a precedent of "beating" the goal times, its not very satisfying to run the goal times.
The other thing is that one could fundamentally question whether it was even fair of me to set this as "goal pace". 6:45 was once my tempo pace, but that was after 2 years of hard work and much more intense training than what I'm doing now. I guess if I'm honest with myself, even while knowing that the point of it is to practice running 100 second laps, I didn't WANT that. What I wanted was some indication that 100 second laps would start to feel like a pedestrian pace sometime SOONER rather than later, and needless to say, I didn't get that. Logically, I'm not even sure why I expected to get that.
I'm reminded now about a blog that Sara Hall wrote about the value of being able to have a short term memory. Sometimes, you need a short term memory in order to have mental health, and you need mental health in order to be the best you can be in the future. I know that the bulk of the disgruntlement that I feel about my training these days is because every step of the way from here until "where I used to be" feels excruciatingly like remedial math. No one WANTS to be in remedial math, when their classmates are in Calculus. Unfortunately, it's still not easy to cheerfully accept remedial math, even if you know its good for you.
Wednesday 06/18: 45:19, Monterrey to bridge. Sleeping problems continue, part of it is that it's still hot at night, part of it is that my mental state basically resembles a jungle and a quagmire... woke up late this morning and it was hot and I was massively dehydrated. I've learned better how to manage such situations, but I've concluded that I still don't enjoy them. Drank 3 glasses of water afterwards and still didn't feel quite right. Was also vaguely troubled by the fact that I used to be absolutely horrified that this run took 44 minutes when I was tired... but lately 45 and 46 minute performances have crept up... I almost want to gmaps it to know once and for all how bad the damage is. But must think short term memory, short term memory, short term memory.
Thursday 06/19: 45:22, Huntington/Virginia disaster. This is a run that might have been a good run, but one in which circumstances, unfortunately had other plans. Insomnia continues, resulting in waking up late, which pushed this run over into the evening (which I dislike to begin with). Add to that the fact that the thermometer was still having trouble dipping under 90, and having consumed about the greasiest cheesiest lunch one could imagine. I was already feeling sick after lunch, and running in the heat after that... I simply can't remember any other run that I've done where I was trying to shove down the violent urge to hurl every step of the way. Given that, I really just wanted to be done with this ASAP, so I thought that I was hurrying the best I could, and was honestly bowled over to see the time... it did NOT feel like I was going THAT slow, goodness gracious. Skipped the striders because I was absolutely sure I would hurl if I tried. Just wanted to be invisible, it was so awful. Screw all of this positive thinking crap. It just sucked.
Friday 06/20: Off, shots. Still feeling generally irate today. It's a combination of the sleeping problems and life problems. Oh, and it being 105 degrees every damn day. Argh.
Saturday 06/21: 2:04:20, 32.8 miles on the bike. Heat wave and sleep deprivation continue. Did not feel like running at all. Instead, had a nice breakfast of french toast with Cupcake and talked a lot about math. By 5 pm I felt inspired to ride, and so I did. Initially figured I would do an hour or so, just to get the legs moving, but ended up staying out there for 2 hours, trying to find my peace. 8 laps around the RB, pretty slow ~16 mph, but really enjoyed it. Forgot how different the bike is. It felt like the polar opposite of running, my legs were burning with the unfamiliar exhaustion, but no matter how hard I pushed, I didn't breathe hard at all, it was so strange, I had to sing along to my ipod bc I didn't know what to do with all of this breath. Legs were thoroughly, thoroughly worn out by the end, but I think it did my soul some good.
Goals: Judging from Sunday's run, I don't really think my body found last week very restful. Argh. This week will have to be played by ear.
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Week of 06/08/2008 - 06/14/2008 (Base Week 13)
OLD!
Yesterday when I was at tech to start my run, there were just old people everywhere and not a parking space to be found! Perplexed, I finally located the source of the commotion: "CA Senior Track and Field Championships" were apparently being contested at the Caltech track. Interesting. Most of the old folks looked jolly and happy to be there, but there were a few... the very, very serious, ones... determined and frowning....
I guess this is what happens after Masters racing. I couldn't help but wonder... do I really want this? Is this what's going to happen to me if I don't get my shit together and deal with some running demons now. I kinda, actually I really want to be retired from competitive racing by the time I'm 75. Racing to me is an incredible emotional commitment more than anything else. You do to some degree push away other emotional commitments in order to be the best you can be. I don't know if that's what I want for the rest of my life. When I'm all old and wrinkly, I want to just run whenever I want and do other things whenever I want--play with grand kids, water the plants, cook for the family, go on a trip ... not trundling day in and day out on my walker so that I can beat so and so for the 90-95 age bracket world record in the 400m hobble.
Sunday 06/08: 1:08:21, Monterrey to RB. Thus the down week begins. A slow run, but an enjoyable shortened long day. Basically, I woke up today at 12:59 pm (after getting home from a wedding at 2 am, after a whole week of sleep deprivation) just in time to mash enough buttons on the TV for it to display the Prefontaine Classic. Of course they didn't bother to tell us anything about what happened with the Bekele/Defar world record attempts, but anyways... somehow I was still so tired that I was falling asleep during the commercials. I dunno, I guess this is what happens when you get old. This wasn't even like Caltech sleep deprivation, just a steady stream of late nights and 5-6 hours of sleep, but my body was totally trashed by today. I woke up and my legs were completely sore and stiff, despite very slow running or no running for the past 3 days. Shoulders were tight, general headachey, body-achey awfulness.
For this reason, my goal for this down week's long run was just to run as slow as I needed to feel good and loosen up all of the things that were complaining, which I did, and felt a lot better and stronger by the end. A cute little girl in a pink dress took a shine to me as well, and ran up the little hill at the far end of the Arroyo Tempo Loop with me. She said her name was Gabriella, and her parents were excited that she was already running. I hope she grows up to be a runner some day.
Monday 06/09: Off, shots. Argh, massive gastrointestinal issues, food poisoning (?) couldn't sleep, felt barfy all day. Didn't really eat much of anything. Horrible.
Tuesday 06/10: 46:24, Monterrey to bridge. Still felt a little bit barfy, but mostly just weak. Maybe bc of the not eating. Crawled through this short run, no hope of doing the scheduled Tuesday tempo workout.
Wednesday 06/11: 48:09, warm up, 2 mile steady state, cool down. In retrospect I wish that I had pushed this off until tomorrow... but what it really comes down to is that I wish that I had a better understanding of my body and more control over my emotional state to be able to make good decisions for where I currently am. In this case, the benefit of being more recovered from food poisoning should have been more than the benefit of having the extra day between tempo day and the longer harder runs that I tend to want to do on the weekends... but I chose wrong, because I like to believe I can do more on any given day than I really can, and it greatly irked me to have to potentially push back some of the other workouts I'd planned.
In observance of the down week, but more bc I still felt crappy, shrank down the planned 3 miles to 2 miles: 7:10,7:15, except worse feeling than the 3 mile steady state that I did a while back. So much for improvement. I am also disgruntled about the fact that my threshold pace appears to be still 30 seconds/mile slower than what I would like it to be. That just feels like a really big gap to fill... meh.
Thursday 06/12: 44:30, Monterrey to bridge again. Crappy but some improvement. Basically, how hard it is to get out of bed is probably the best indicator of when runs won't go well. It was still really hard today, but at least it didn't feel quite as much like I was going to die as some other days. I guess this is another data point to support that "what's wrong" with me is systemic, instead of weak legs, diminished lung capacity, etc. I actually do feel like those things have made a lot of progress, progress that isn't always reflected in my workouts, which is frustrating.
Friday 06/13: Off, shots. Friday the 13th! Nothing too scary, save for the amount of food that I consumed today. Felt sick. Argh.
Saturday 06/14: 43:06, Huntington/Virginia at about noon, 85 and sunny. Not my favorite conditions, but took it real easy and the heat didn't bother me at all, surprisingly. A good chunk of technical stuff that I've been neglecting lately afterwards, plus 2 x 200m accelerations, focusing on turnover. Learned something that might have been of use to me 5 years ago in my brief sprinting career: apparently one's go-fast muscles are in your butt. That's what started cramping when I tried to kick up the turnover. It's a little bit scary to think that I don't really recall using these muscles ever before.
Training this week: 4:10:30
Goals: To sleep and recover to be able to go into this next weekend strong.
Yesterday when I was at tech to start my run, there were just old people everywhere and not a parking space to be found! Perplexed, I finally located the source of the commotion: "CA Senior Track and Field Championships" were apparently being contested at the Caltech track. Interesting. Most of the old folks looked jolly and happy to be there, but there were a few... the very, very serious, ones... determined and frowning....
I guess this is what happens after Masters racing. I couldn't help but wonder... do I really want this? Is this what's going to happen to me if I don't get my shit together and deal with some running demons now. I kinda, actually I really want to be retired from competitive racing by the time I'm 75. Racing to me is an incredible emotional commitment more than anything else. You do to some degree push away other emotional commitments in order to be the best you can be. I don't know if that's what I want for the rest of my life. When I'm all old and wrinkly, I want to just run whenever I want and do other things whenever I want--play with grand kids, water the plants, cook for the family, go on a trip ... not trundling day in and day out on my walker so that I can beat so and so for the 90-95 age bracket world record in the 400m hobble.
Sunday 06/08: 1:08:21, Monterrey to RB. Thus the down week begins. A slow run, but an enjoyable shortened long day. Basically, I woke up today at 12:59 pm (after getting home from a wedding at 2 am, after a whole week of sleep deprivation) just in time to mash enough buttons on the TV for it to display the Prefontaine Classic. Of course they didn't bother to tell us anything about what happened with the Bekele/Defar world record attempts, but anyways... somehow I was still so tired that I was falling asleep during the commercials. I dunno, I guess this is what happens when you get old. This wasn't even like Caltech sleep deprivation, just a steady stream of late nights and 5-6 hours of sleep, but my body was totally trashed by today. I woke up and my legs were completely sore and stiff, despite very slow running or no running for the past 3 days. Shoulders were tight, general headachey, body-achey awfulness.
For this reason, my goal for this down week's long run was just to run as slow as I needed to feel good and loosen up all of the things that were complaining, which I did, and felt a lot better and stronger by the end. A cute little girl in a pink dress took a shine to me as well, and ran up the little hill at the far end of the Arroyo Tempo Loop with me. She said her name was Gabriella, and her parents were excited that she was already running. I hope she grows up to be a runner some day.
Monday 06/09: Off, shots. Argh, massive gastrointestinal issues, food poisoning (?) couldn't sleep, felt barfy all day. Didn't really eat much of anything. Horrible.
Tuesday 06/10: 46:24, Monterrey to bridge. Still felt a little bit barfy, but mostly just weak. Maybe bc of the not eating. Crawled through this short run, no hope of doing the scheduled Tuesday tempo workout.
Wednesday 06/11: 48:09, warm up, 2 mile steady state, cool down. In retrospect I wish that I had pushed this off until tomorrow... but what it really comes down to is that I wish that I had a better understanding of my body and more control over my emotional state to be able to make good decisions for where I currently am. In this case, the benefit of being more recovered from food poisoning should have been more than the benefit of having the extra day between tempo day and the longer harder runs that I tend to want to do on the weekends... but I chose wrong, because I like to believe I can do more on any given day than I really can, and it greatly irked me to have to potentially push back some of the other workouts I'd planned.
In observance of the down week, but more bc I still felt crappy, shrank down the planned 3 miles to 2 miles: 7:10,7:15, except worse feeling than the 3 mile steady state that I did a while back. So much for improvement. I am also disgruntled about the fact that my threshold pace appears to be still 30 seconds/mile slower than what I would like it to be. That just feels like a really big gap to fill... meh.
Thursday 06/12: 44:30, Monterrey to bridge again. Crappy but some improvement. Basically, how hard it is to get out of bed is probably the best indicator of when runs won't go well. It was still really hard today, but at least it didn't feel quite as much like I was going to die as some other days. I guess this is another data point to support that "what's wrong" with me is systemic, instead of weak legs, diminished lung capacity, etc. I actually do feel like those things have made a lot of progress, progress that isn't always reflected in my workouts, which is frustrating.
Friday 06/13: Off, shots. Friday the 13th! Nothing too scary, save for the amount of food that I consumed today. Felt sick. Argh.
Saturday 06/14: 43:06, Huntington/Virginia at about noon, 85 and sunny. Not my favorite conditions, but took it real easy and the heat didn't bother me at all, surprisingly. A good chunk of technical stuff that I've been neglecting lately afterwards, plus 2 x 200m accelerations, focusing on turnover. Learned something that might have been of use to me 5 years ago in my brief sprinting career: apparently one's go-fast muscles are in your butt. That's what started cramping when I tried to kick up the turnover. It's a little bit scary to think that I don't really recall using these muscles ever before.
Training this week: 4:10:30
Goals: To sleep and recover to be able to go into this next weekend strong.
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